Football is a funny game. It was only a few weeks ago we were thrashing Gillingham 5-0 - but it can change in seconds.

We need to bring back a little bit of spark and maybe we are lacking a little bit of self confidence.

One minute you are up and the next you are down, it is like a yo-yo, which is exactly how we felt on Tuesday night against Leyton Orient.

After we conceded a goal so late on we thought the game had gone from us, so to get the late equaliser from Hasney was fantastic.

At the moment things are not going our way and we're not on the best run, after defeats to Port Vale, Doncaster Rovers and only a 1-1 draw on Tuesday.

But just because we've had a few bad results, confidence doesn't completely shatter.

We know we are a good team.

But a point at home was still disappointing because we wanted to go into the FA Cup game at Wycombe on the back of a win.

It's no secret that when you are in the cup you think if you can get to the third or fourth round you can get a big team.

But we are still at least two games away from that and need to put in a good show on Saturday in order to progress.

I don't know if I am going to make the team yet, nobody does. But I'll admit I'm disappointed at my lack of action recently.

I had a positive meeting with the gaffer last week. It was a football meeting and was something we needed to do.

I am not happy because I am not playing but I can accept it. I have got to knuckle down to get back into the team.

I always want to play but I will be desperate to when we go to Leeds United on Saturday week.

I haven't spoken to Dennis Wise but it will be nice to catch up with him.

Leeds are on a fantastic run and it will be a big game, but we have to concentrate on Wycombe this week first.

As well as my journalism, and my brief foray into hairdressing a couple of weeks ago, I'm helping people who are recovering from alcoholism, which is obviously a major part of my life after my problems last year.

I'm not counselling anyone, I wouldn't call it that, but there have been a few people who have contacted me to ask for a chat and it has been a pleasure to help them.

I remember, when I was in their situation, it was important to contact certain people and talk about issues.

In recovery you have to help others to help yourself, that is part of the deal, and it has helped me talking to other people as well.